hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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