I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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