is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
