No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
