road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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