you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
