I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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