Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
