I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
