this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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