how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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