1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
