Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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