All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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