After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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