and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
