Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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