My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
The uberlube is also flammable
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
