You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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