ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
