Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize