I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
