You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
