More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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