did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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