This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
