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Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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