If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
My vagina is very pro this idea
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
