My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
