is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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