You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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