I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize