Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
