Me too!
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize
