I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Randomize
