Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
