She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We have started to decorate penises.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
