We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize