her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Randomize
