i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I just want to make out with him forever
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
