please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
