So drunk, too bad you don't want this
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
