Having a random hookup so left but love u
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You are the jesus of drinking
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
