I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
