Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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