Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
