i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
