you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
