I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
