She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
